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Monday, December 22, 2008

Twilight rant to myself.

I finally gave in to the squealy girl inside of me and saw Twilight.

Not bad, and not awesome. Okay.

Though critical about the books, I have read them all. You may be wondering why, and I can only explain that I was attracted to one aspect of them. The writing may be terribly mushy, extremely unprofessional, and unrealistic, but there was something about the storyline that called to me. I've come to realize, after thinking about it, that it was Bella. The heroine, the scintillating beauty... who thinks she is completely normal and deserves to get no attention from others. I felt a little glimmer of something inside of me, that part of me that wishes to fade into the background and just be left alone...

And then she finds Edward and blah blah blah... Mr. Right, Mr. Perfect, Mr. The Only One For Me. And she falls madly in love.

Love is a funny thing. You find yourself doing crazy unexplainable things for its sake. You find yourself completely engrossed in someone... in their little habits, their idiosyncrasies, their quirks. And you can't imagine your life apart from them.

All Bella says when Edward mentions the danger of being with a vampire, is "Don't leave me." He promises to stay with her forever. Then suddenly, when she is put in danger, he feels guilty. He changes his mind, and does "the right thing". He leaves. Nothing could be less right for her.

It was right then that I felt the connection to Bella. She is clutching her stomach like something has been literally ripped out of her body, stumbling blindly. She is dead inside. She can't believe he would leave her.

I know the situation well. Right when I get to know someone, they leave. Every time, my chest hurts, and I find it hard to swallow. Every time I think they'll come back. And every time I want to yell at them, "Don't leave me. Don't you dare leave me."

The movie, I thought, was a bit over the top, but I felt that connection when Bella whispers for Edward not to leave. And that is why I can't ignore the fact that I enjoyed the movie. It was nice to see someone stay for a change... I just wish it wasn't a stupid shiny vampire. How impractical :)

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